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2003-07-19 - 7:04 p.m. I'm a Chicken, People Uh... Yes. I am being a big scairdy cat because, well, just because I guess. I have never been good with controlling my nervous jitters since middle school, when I was always asked to do something that involved standing in front of the whole school and talk. I lost that ability in high school... well, not the ability to be a great reader, but rather the ability to stand in front of a crowd and gab. I didn't get much practice outside of my religion class in junior and senior year, where we were routinely asked to present something orally. Of course, that too disappeared by the time I was done with college. I have some trouble with the whole crowd thing in English, and I break down into tears whenever I attempt it in Japanese. Um, long story short, there has been a message from the guy in Japan waiting for me to open since WEDNESDAY, and I have been too much of a coward to look at what he wrote to me. I should have opened it right away, I know, because, that way, if it's something bad, like 'Forget it, we don't want you,' then I can stop doing things like: putting my hopes up again, saving my meager wages, and planning my sayonara party (which you are cordially invited to, if I know you in RL. Otherwise...) But I'm being a chicken. Buk-buk-bukaw. .... .... .... Oh! It's good! I'm okay! Wohoooh! Wait... Now I have to mail out the contract they sent me, signed. There goes another $17. But it will be worth it! Now, excuse me while I put my hopes on the mantle, along with all the dreams that haven't been shattered yet... or I got around to fixing with Krazy-Glue. I just hope this mantle doesn't fall down again. The Past - Guestbook - The Future, Too |